I am a female civil servant. I also had an affair once and it was great (adult rape and abuse novel)

Once upon a time, I absolutely did not believe that extramarital affairs would have anything to do with me.

I was born into a scholarly family. Although my family has declined, my father has always been very strict in my family education, so much so that everyone thinks that I should be absolutely traditional.

But if someone compares "frivolous peach blossoms flowing with water" to women, I would definitely not object. Time always passes by inadvertently. When I grew from a little girl into a graceful young girl, I was always vaguely longing for something. When the TV series "The Bund" was released, I was fascinated by Chow Yun-fat who played Xu Wenqiang. I began to follow him in various media. Occasionally, when I saw him smiling or thinking on a poster somewhere on the street, I could not help but feel moved, and I was always reluctant to leave. This habit has not changed until now.

By the time I fully realized that it was impossible for me to marry Fa Zai, there were already a group of boys around me who liked me. I once thought that I would have a passionate love, but the reality was that there was no suspense. My husband Kevin was my college classmate, gentle and handsome. When he frequently showed his courtesy to me among all the suitors and persisted to the end, I finally gave my hand to him, although I didn't like him very much.

Then they fell in love, got married and had children. He worked in administration at the hospital and I worked in publicity at the office. The ordinary days passed by quietly like water. Sometimes, when I sat in front of the dressing table and looked at my pretty face in the mirror, I would secretly shed tears. I felt sorry for myself: how could a beautiful woman who was not even thirty years old live such a dull life? I even regretted marrying Kevin, although I always felt ashamed of this regret. Whether I shed tears or feel regret, the rich and worry-free family life and my father's words of supporting my husband and educating my children often make me give up my restless thoughts.

If I worked from nine to five every day, everything as usual, I might be a pure and peaceful woman all my life. But life is like a mysterious kaleidoscope, and a slight turn can make a big difference.

Zhang Wei is a hero in our city. He is the captain of the criminal police team of the Public Security Bureau. He is widely praised for solving several difficult cases. I heard that some gangsters would be terrified when they heard his name. I have only seen him on TV and in newspapers, and I have a feeling that he is a mysterious figure that can only be found from head to tail.

On this day, because our unit was going to organize an activity to learn from the hero Zhang Wei, in order to make the activity successful, the section chief sent me to the Public Security Bureau to collect information about Zhang Wei's advanced deeds. When I got there and met Zhang Wei in person, I found that he was not as silent and resolute as I had imagined. His ivory skin had a healthy luster, his eyes were small but bright, he was of medium height, and looked handsome and kind. When he smiled, his two dimples had a childlike innocence. He kept saying that he was just fulfilling the duties of a policeman, and he was not as magical as people said. He kept refusing, so I had to look for other people. Fortunately, Chen Ying from his office helped us and told us a lot of stories about how he outsmarted criminals and solved cases. Listening to those thrilling stories, I could hardly connect the smiling man in front of me with the man who remained fearless even with three knives on his neck. I felt as if I had fallen into a dream. I had only seen such things in movies, TV shows and novels before, but I didn't expect such a thing to happen in the city near me. When I looked at Zhang Wei again, a strange feeling surged in my heart, and I actually asked for his pager and mobile phone number in the name of work.

Perhaps out of my own curiosity, I suggested to the section chief that in order for our comrades in the unit to better learn from the hero and learn from his dedication to work, it is necessary to further understand his family. The section chief readily agreed.

I called Zhang Wei's cell phone, but he didn't seem very happy about us going to his house. Only after my repeated requests did he agree to let us go at nine o'clock on Sunday morning. The short few days of waiting seemed so long to me.

On Sunday, I changed my habit of sleeping in and got up early. I put on my favorite light purple sweater and tied a brown scarf. I looked at myself in the mirror again and again and felt that I looked very feminine with my rosy lips and white teeth. Then I put on my small purse and went to Zhang Wei's house with Xiao Shi, who was from the same unit and whom I had made an appointment with in advance.

His family lives in the suburbs, a very remote place. When I entered his home, I was stunned by the scene in front of me. It was a small house with two bedrooms and a living room, which looked very simple. Apart from a 29-inch color TV and an ordinary VCD, the house was almost bare. His daughter, about ten years old, was doing homework at the table. He was wearing a floral apron and hanging a large basin of clothes. A woman about his age was sitting in a wheelchair, with delicate features, watching him hanging clothes on the balcony. The sunlight on her face made her look calm and gentle.

His wife asked us to sit down and his daughter skillfully poured us tea. We had just sat down when his pager rang. He called back and apologized to us that something happened in the suburbs and he had to go check it out. His wife nodded gently, and he touched his wife's hand before leaving and quickly went downstairs. We started talking to his wife, and we found out that they were childhood sweethearts. She used to be a salesperson in the Xinhua Bookstore. Although he was busy with work, they loved each other and had a lovely daughter. But three years ago, on a rainy day, when she went to pick up her daughter, she unfortunately had a car accident. The damn truck broke one of her legs and almost took her life. She gradually became paralyzed on one side of her body out of helplessness. For a long time, she tried to divorce him, but he would not agree. Apart from work, he spent all his time taking care of her and their daughter. When she talked about this, her tears couldn't stop flowing. Xiao Shi and I looked at each other and couldn't help but burst into tears.

After leaving his home, I knew that this optimistic, strong, kind and excellent man was like a seed blown by the wind, destined to take root in my heart.

Later, my contact with Zhang Wei became more frequent, and gradually, we both regarded each other as confidants of the opposite sex. This activity of our unit was a great success because of my full efforts. My colleagues in the unit said that such a hero who loves life, is passionate and values ​​righteousness is respectable, and I was praised by the leaders for this.

Not long after that, the department held a dinner party and we specially invited Zhang Wei. During the meal, we toasted him frequently and he did not refuse. He drank one cup after another, as generous as a man drinking on a dirt pit in Northeast China. His face was red and he didn't say much. His two dimples kept jumping under the light. At this moment, I looked at this good man in front of me, and my heart was filled with emotion. In the vast sea of ​​​​people, people's hearts are impetuous, men and women are struggling with all kinds of desires, but he treats his disabled wife with a broad mind, treats his busy work with full enthusiasm, and is so outstanding, I suddenly realized that this man is the one I have been looking for all my life!

While I was daydreaming, everyone was about to leave. I couldn't help but worry when I saw him shaking hands with our section chief and saying goodbye. Just then, the section chief said to me, "Xiao Chen, you've been to Captain Zhang's house. Please see him off. He's drunk quite a bit of wine." I thought this opportunity was exactly what I had been waiting for.

When we were in the taxi about a mile away from his home, I asked him, "Do you want to get off and walk for a while? Maybe you will feel more comfortable." He nodded obediently.

The wind on an April night blew coolly on my body, but I could clearly feel a warm comfort. We seemed to have agreed to walk into the shade of the trees by the roadside together. My heart was as dazed as a girl in her first love. It was so quiet around me. I could clearly smell the strong smell of alcohol on him. He accidentally stepped on a stone and staggered. I quickly pulled his hand, but he was standing there and hugged me tightly. I was stunned by his sudden action. My mind was blank. He kissed me deeply without giving me a chance to explain. I couldn't see his face in the night, but I felt his breathing getting heavier and his masculine desire growing.

"Xiao Chen," he murmured as he kissed me, "I am not as holy as others say. I am too miserable. I need a woman, a real woman."

In the midst of his frenzy I felt something wet dripping onto my face and he was crying! For a moment, I felt infinite love for this man. "I understand you," I hugged him gently and said, "You have had a very hard life."

As I let him kiss and caress me, my breasts began to rise and fall like rabbits, and my husband and children receded from my mind like the tide...

At this time, a speeding car honked its horn at us. We separated in fear. After calming down, he repeatedly said, "I'm sorry! I'm sorry!" I walked over and covered his mouth with my hands, shaking my head gently. He looked at me gratefully, took my hand and walked to a nearby clump of woods, listening to the rustling sound of leaves in the wind.

He began to tell me about the hardships he had experienced over the past few years. After his wife became paralyzed, she lost all feeling in her lower body. Police Officer Xing was often so busy at work that he worked from dawn to dusk. When he got home, his wife's incontinence was the most worrying thing for him. For this reason, most of his salary was spent on buying diapers. Their married life had long been in name only, and their daughter was still young and ignorant. He said that he didn't even know how he managed to get through it. It was late at night and everyone was asleep. Every word he said shocked me. Every second passed by like the wind. At this moment, the pager in my bag rang. I knew it was my husband calling without even looking. He said to me apologetically: "I'm so sorry today. You gave me a gift but I... I'm such a piece of shit!" I calmly held his hand and said: "You don't have to say anything. I have liked you since the moment we met! Take care of yourself! Goodbye!" When I turned and left, I didn't know what kind of expression he would have behind me? From childhood to adulthood, I have always been loved and pursued by many boys, and I have never taken the initiative to express my feelings to a member of the opposite sex. But today, today is an exception. I feel like a happy bird is flying out of my heart and flying towards the boundless night.

It has been almost two months since I separated from Zhang Wei. During this time, I have truly experienced what it means to be "lonely when love is deep." I thought about his inappropriate kiss and gentle touch that night, the hot tears he dripped on my face, and the difficulties in his life. I felt sorry for his pain, and when I heard that he was gloriously elected as a representative of the National People's Congress, I was proud of his pride. No one knows that every pore of my body is thinking about him. Under my cheerful and happy appearance is infinite loneliness, just like a song says: "The person you care about is never the right one." The person I love is always separated from me by thousands of mountains and rivers.

I thought about him restlessly, feeling anxious and sleepy. Kevin didn't notice my change. Although he had a lot of free time, he mostly spent it drinking and playing mahjong with his friends. Because he snored so loudly when he slept, I had him and my son sleep in separate rooms since we had our son. Now that my son is five years old, he has moved into his own little bedroom, which gives me my own private space.

At night, Kevin often took me to his bedroom and had sex with me. In the morning I make breakfast and he takes our son to kindergarten. It seems that nothing has changed in our ordinary life.

One day I received a call from Zhang Wei. I couldn't believe my ears. He asked me if I could go to his house to help. I was so happy that I didn't know what to do. After hanging up the phone, I quickly returned to my home not far from my workplace and hurriedly picked out my favorite summer outfit: a light pink shirt with a waist and a knee-length creamy white one-step skirt.

When I stepped onto the stairs of his house, I could clearly hear my heartbeat and I didn't understand why I was so nervous.

When I entered his house, I saw that his hair was messy and his face was yellow. The chair, bed and table were piled with clothes, newspapers, instant noodle bags and other things. I said, "Did the world war happen?" He said, "Chen Li, my wife took the children to her sister's house for the summer vacation. I have been on duty for three consecutive days and I am very tired. Can you help me tidy up?"

I looked at him and nodded, then put on my apron and started to get busy. I was also surprised that when I was helping him with the housework, it was as if this was my home. I cleaned up little by little, washing and wiping, and he quietly passed things to me. When everything was done, he said, "Thank you!"

I looked at him and smiled, "Boy, it's not over yet!" Hearing what I said, he said a little embarrassedly, "I think it's pretty good!" I said sit down, and he sat on the chair obediently. I got a towel and wrapped it around his neck, poured shampoo on his hair, and I said, "Your hair is too dirty, let me wash it for you." He said, "How can I do this?" I said, "How can you let me do housework for you if you're embarrassed? Be good and don't move!" He no longer refused, and I gently scrubbed his hair. His hair was thick and dense. Facing the man I liked, I was happy in my heart. I hoped I could wash away his fatigue. He leaned on me and fell asleep after a while. I thought he was too tired. I didn't dare to move, for fear of waking him up.

But maybe it was because of his job, he only slept for about ten minutes. After waking up, he said sorry. I patted his head and said, "Don't move, I haven't finished washing yet!" Time passed quickly. I admire Einstein's theory of phases. Really, the time I spent with him passed by so much faster than the time I spent with a cup of tea and reading a newspaper in the office.

There was nothing in his refrigerator except eggs. I cooked for him, stewed an egg, and took off my apron and handed it to him.

"Xiao Li," he actually called me by my nickname: "I'll take you home."

"Well, it's time for me to go home." My heart suddenly felt empty.

I could see that his eyes were full of attachment. He didn't say anything, but I felt nervous. The strong feeling of loss made me feel sad. In order to prevent him from seeing the tears in my eyes, I turned my back and went to the door to change my shoes.

He followed me and was about to open the door for me, but I turned around suddenly and his hand, which was about to open the door, touched my chest. He took a step back as if he had been electrocuted.

For a full ten seconds, our eyes met, and the next moment, we hugged each other tightly without any prior agreement. He kept kissing me, first on my mouth and then on my neck. I stroked his shoulders and hair through his sweatshirt, and he touched my hips and thighs through my skirt.

"You look especially beautiful today."

"Why?"

"Pink shirt, white skirt, like?

"A pink shirt and a white skirt, like a beautiful lily."

"Put your hand up my skirt." I whispered in his ear, my voice soft but firm. He hesitated for a moment and reached in. Through the narrow one-step skirt, I felt his trembling hands, moving from the inside of my thighs to the most private part of a woman.

Suddenly, his pager rang. This was something I didn't want to hear. I really wanted to give this man tenderness and love for the rest of my life. But after he returned the call, his expression became serious. He said to me, "I have an urgent mission. Sorry, I have to leave!" "It's okay," I straightened my dress and hair and went downstairs with him. Looking at his receding back, tears blurred my eyes again.

A week later on Saturday, Kevin was going to Beijing for further studies. A few days ago, my son had been clamoring to go with him, so early in the morning, I arranged to send them to the airport.

After returning home alone in the afternoon, I dragged my tired body to the bathroom to take a bath. When I got up to wipe the water, I stared blankly at my naked body in the floor-length mirror, unable to suppress my desire to see Zhang Wei.

I called his pager and lied to him that I had something urgent and asked him to come to my house no matter what. He must have thought I was in trouble and said he would be right over. I went into my closet and quickly found the outfit I wore to his house last week: a light pink shirt with a waist and a creamy white one-step skirt that reached my knees. After changing my clothes, I ran to the mirror and looked at myself. I really looked like a lily.

Twenty minutes later, he rang my doorbell, breathlessly.

As soon as he came in, he asked me what was going on with concern. I watched him and saw that he had lost a lot of weight in just over a week.

I took him into my bedroom and closed the door gently. Turning around and looking at the person I think about day and night, I threw myself into his arms, unable to utter a word. I choked and told him that nothing was wrong, I just missed him.

He pushed me away and said, "Xiao Li, don't be like this. I have a mission tonight and I have to go back. Maybe you and I are not destined to be together."

I grabbed his hand and said, "That's not the case. Do you know how much your Sayuri misses you?"

He looked at me steadily, then hugged me tightly, kissed my forehead, my eyes, and my lips. The scene last week was destined not to end so hastily. I once again felt the tenderness coming from under my skirt. His hands became firm, wandering between my legs and lower body. "Sayuri, I missed you too. I love you so much."

I felt his thrusts, hard against my belly, and it made me intoxicated.

"I want you to prove it with your actions." I tossed my hair back: "Let your little lily bloom for you."

"Well, I want to see the blooming lilies." His hands began to unbutton my dress, one by one, quickly but gently. The pink shirt was parted along the deep cleavage, covering my chest; the cream-colored tight skirt slid down my long legs and fell to the ground.

I shyly pulled up his sweatshirt and unbuckled his belt; his broad chest was covered with strong muscles, and a stubborn tent was erected under his tight underwear, which made me feel dizzy.

He captured my heaving breasts from between my arms and rubbed them through my bra. "The button is here," I took his hand and guided him behind my back like a teacher who teaches by example. He was a bit clumsy but he managed to pop my bra open and the straps were pulled down along with my shirt so that my breasts stood proudly in front of him.

"Is your little Lily pretty?"

"Xiao Li, my little Sayuri, I love you so much!" He suddenly grabbed one of my nipples with both hands and squeezed it hard. "Oh~", I couldn't help but cry out as I watched my tender breasts deform under his hands, and my lower body was completely wet.

"Ah Wei, I already have an IUD.

"Ah Wei, I've already had an IUD inserted. Let's pick your little lily well today."

"Yeah," he picked me up and put me on the bed. I stretched myself out, welcoming his body pressing against me, waiting for him to tell me with his body that he loved me.

We kissed deeply, our tongues entwined.

He wandered over my body, his right hand following the depression of my back to my waist, while his left hand slid from my armpit to my chest, feeling the bulging breasts of a mature woman.

I was under him, gently caressing his back and hair. My eyes were hazy, as if there was a layer of fog, and I let out a low, trembling moan from my mouth.

He put one of my breasts in his mouth, sucked it, and nibbled the nipple with his teeth. The feeling of breastfeeding made me intoxicated. Gradually, he kissed my breasts and lower abdomen...

When his hands rested on my waist, I lifted my hips slightly as if by telepathy, allowing him to remove this last bit of cover. His dark thing finally popped out of the "tent". It was so thick and stood upright as if in demonstration to me.

"What a beautiful lily," he hugged me tightly and kissed me madly.

"Oh∼Hmm∼" I hugged him, twisting my body gently, emitting a strange heat, my fragrant hair scattered messily on my shoulders, my legs involuntarily opened, clamped his waist, and pressed tightly against him.

"Come in," my heart was already boiling hot, "Come and pick your little lilies."

A sour and swollen feeling came from my lower abdomen. It was the first time I was invaded by a man other than Kevin, and it was accompanied by the pleasure of having my lower body stretched out.

At this moment, the man I love enters my body, and the world is shut out of us...

For the whole afternoon, we were lingering, whispering, and listening to each other's breathing and heartbeats. He kept repeating to me: "I am finally happy, Sayuri, you are my woman! Since I met you, I have been thinking about you." I felt that Zhang Wei in front of me was not the steel-like man in people's minds, but a ship that was exhausted after a long journey and temporarily found a shore to dock. This man was the only one I wanted actively, and he really gave me the happiness of being a woman. When night fell, I felt%

When night falls, I feel that all the flowers in my life are slowly blooming, so gorgeous, vivid and with incomparable beauty.

I don't know how long it was before his pager rang again, and I knew that was his signal to leave. He said to me, "Sorry, I have to leave again!" He pulled my hand as if he was talking to his wife and left quickly without waiting for me to say anything.

That night, the rain was knocking on the window and I tossed and turned in my bed. I felt guilty about Kevin, but more than that, I was carefully recalling every moment with Zhang Wei. This man haunted me even more than my first love. He was lively, tender, excellent and even a little tired. If he had taken root in my heart, now the roots had flourished. Perhaps this was my fate in past and present lives and I could not avoid it.

A sleepless night passed and the rain finally stopped. Maybe it was because I didn’t get enough rest, my heart was beating wildly. I don’t know why, but I always felt something was wrong.

After work, I saw my colleagues gathered together, talking about the situation. It was a chaotic and noisy place. Xiao Shi came up to me and said, "Chen Li, do you know? Zhang Wei died!"