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In recent years, some people have divided the sexual process into five stages: sexual desire, sexual arousal, vascular congestion, orgasm and sexual satisfaction. This pays more attention to the psychological feelings at the beginning and end of sexual desire and sexual satisfaction than the division of the sexual response cycle originally proposed by Masters and Johnson. According to statistics, about 40% of women who can often reach orgasm think that their sexual relationships are unsatisfactory. So what is a man's subjective feeling about orgasm? In recent years, sex researchers have introduced philosophical ideas into the field of sex research and proposed a series of philosophical concepts, one of which is male sexual pleasure.
Sexual ecstasy usually refers to a peak experience in interpersonal communication, which is the wonderful, pleasant and relaxed feeling experienced after sexual climax. Many experiences in life are difficult to express in words, and the same is true for the experience of sexual bliss. Just as some people have musical or artistic talents, some people have a natural gift for sexual expression and are more capable of experiencing sexual ecstasy than the average person. According to these people, orgasm and ejaculation are not the same thing, but two separate processes. In the past, sexologists, including women themselves, thought that since women do not have a penis and cannot ejaculate, they do not have the ability to have an orgasm. Now women understand that not only can they have an orgasm, but they can have multiple orgasms. The reason they have this ability that is very different from and even exceeds that of men is that they do not focus their sexual activity on a specific organ such as the penis, so it does not stop immediately due to ejaculation. According to the extrasensory point of view, men can also achieve multiple orgasms as long as they do not focus the sexual experience on the penis and, more importantly, never confuse orgasm with ejaculation. Experimental studies have found that before men ejaculate and reach a final intense orgasm, multiple orgasmic responses without ejaculation are often recorded, which further illustrates the similarities between male and female sexual responses.
Judging from the descriptions of many men of their ejaculation process, they experience a very intense pleasure in the genital area, the feeling of which is very strong and almost painful. Then there is a sense of release or relief. This explanation is consistent with Freud's theory of the sexual pleasure principle. According to this view, tension can be released through a physiological relaxation process and a spiritualization of the body, in other words, by transforming tension into "sexual ecstasy." As a genital-centered man, his breathing becomes deeper and irregular during ejaculation, and he may exhibit symptoms such as "cramps" and temporarily lose control, entering a trance-like state. This reaction may also be accompanied by various forms of fear reactions. In contrast, men who easily experience sexual ecstasy breathe calmly and never lose control. They remain energized after intercourse instead of being exhausted. Most men experience a state of rest or calm after ejaculation, with the penis usually being too sensitive to tolerate any further stimulation and, therefore, remaining in an unresponsive, limp state. Complete physical exhaustion can be a very pleasurable moment, and it is exactly what most men experience after having sex.
For a man, he can only experience sexual bliss with a partner he loves, and love alone is not enough. He must also have a very thorough understanding of his wife, full trust in her, and get her full cooperation. Sexual ecstasy cannot be manufactured; all one can do is learn to experience it. Perhaps the best way to explain it is through this metaphor: sexual delight occurs like a piece of music that is performed very elegantly, and the musician must have a thorough understanding of his instrument and be proficient in the required techniques. A musician must learn how to make the "self" disappear, at least temporarily, so that the music can flow unimpeded through his fingers. During lovemaking, the body is the instrument and the music is sexual bliss. One fact that must be acknowledged is that successful lovemaking (not just routine sexual intercourse) requires at least 1 hour, and sometimes even longer.
Why do many men not experience sexual joy? How can we help people develop the ability to experience sexual ecstasy? Let us first consider some general factors that may hinder the ability to develop sexual joy. They are:
⑴. Equating orgasm with ejaculation and investing too much energy in ejaculation.
⑵. Excessively concentrating the points of sexual excitement on the genitals, completely detaching the body outside the genitals from sexual pleasure.
⑶. Unable to maintain strong sexual tension for a long time without immediate ejaculation.
(⑷) Fixing the sexual relationship in which the man plays the active role and the woman plays the passive role does not mobilize the woman’s initiative.
⑸. There are difficulties in communication between the two parties.
⑹. The man only cares about his own climax, does not consider the other party's requirements at all, and does not respect the other party's feelings. This selfish man only knows how to rush into the action, finish it quickly, and then fall asleep. |
